I was married 21 years. This is my wedding dress.
While I use this dress to represent growth from failures and
challenges – wearing it – this book is not trivialising a long marriage which resulted in three beautiful children and many memories. This book is also not encouraging separation or divorce. Marriage is a blessed sacrament which should be protected ferociously. 21 Choices is to support people who find themselves here when the choice is not theirs or when the choice is made after every other choice has been exhausted. Its purpose is to promote: confronting, thinking through, and building courage; remembering we always have some choices.
I know from experience that the awareness of choices does not ensure we make the right ones. Life is a long rehearsal with an ever changing plot and theme. Although this book does not contain the secret to perpetual happiness, it does whisper between the lines: ’Everything will be okay if you: resiliently keep trying, persistently love God, and compassionately forgive yourself’.
On the 14th of June 2011, when my marriage ended, I had a choice: to burn the dress or to brave its significance. These were my other choices.
This book celebrates facing adversity,
one choice at a time.